Today, I’ll put into words one of the discomforts I’ve felt throughout my life.
That discomfort takes the form of this question:
Why do people so readily accept
being reduced to something “easy to explain”?
It’s a question that has always existed within me.
This article also serves as a statement of my stance as an artist, putting my perspective into words and giving it some form.
Is this just a personal “thinking habit”?
I’ve always lived with a strong sense of discomfort at having my personality defined by some social framework or explained as a role. Yet modern society pressures us to “specialize, fix your genre,” to “sell off parts of yourself.” This applies to social media and to working within organizations alike.
Those who resist this pressure face consequences: on social media, their visibility is reduced and they become invisible; within organizations, they suffer deteriorating workplace standing or unfavorable treatment in performance evaluations. Ultimately, they are subjected to social sanctions, effectively rendered “non-existent.”
This structure feels suffocating and deeply unsettling.
I keep wondering why I feel such strong discomfort toward “being submerged in a role” or “people who are so submerged in their role they never question it.”
Why do I feel such rejection? Why do so many people accept selling off their roles and personalities without much resistance? Could it be that I’m just extremely clumsy?
The ease of sticking to one’s role
I’ll move on to the next step in articulating the sense of unease within me. Next, I’d like to consider what one gains by taking on a role.
What one gains by taking on a role is generally something like this:
- Not having to think about what to do each time
- Not having to explain who you are every time
- Being able to remain steady, to avoid hesitation
- Criticism being directed at the role, rather than at one’s character
Thinking this way, it becomes clear that a role also functions like a liability shield.
- “Because I’m a craftsman”
- “Because I’m liberal”
- “Because I’m a company employee”
In this way, in modern society, roles function as a protective shell for oneself. I think it’s a very rational function.
The lingering sense of unease
Even after explaining “roles” this far, the sense of unease within me shows no sign of fading.
“You have the role of being XX, so you should do this.”
“In that position, you should say this / you shouldn’t say that.”
As I’ve grown older, I’ve come to understand that what I feel when subjected to this kind of pressure isn’t so much a feeling of being constrained,
but rather a sensation of being eroded away.
I want to maintain a stance of weighing the pros and cons in everything. The contradictory parts of myself, the wavering parts—all of that together is who I am.
But the moment I clearly declare, “I’m on this side,” even things I never intended get boxed in, and what I should or shouldn’t do gets dictated from the outside. I see myself as a contradictory being, but taking on a “role” makes it impossible to keep thinking in that mixed-up way.
The “human model” that society has standardized
Having thought this through, I’ve come to feel that the source of my discomfort isn’t so much what you might call “selfishness” or “immaturity,” but rather a sense of unease toward the image of humanity society takes for granted—its “human model,” so to speak.
The human model assumed by modern society might be something like this:
- Can articulate who I am
- Possess a consistent character
- Take on responsibilities
- Can discuss growth and career
The key point I find important is that this “human model” is not an “ideal human model to aspire to,” but rather a common-sense premise, a standard recognized within society. The standard is essentially the line below which one is treated as a “defective product.”
To put this image of a person “below the standard” into concrete words, it would be expressed as follows:
- I can’t fully explain myself
- I keep swaying, keep wandering
- I refuse to take on roles
- I keep thinking, remaining nothing in particular
Needless to say, such “human models” tend to find themselves at a significant disadvantage in modern society. This is because such personal traits are hopelessly incompatible with organizational logic and the mechanisms of commercialism. Consequently, we refer to such individuals as “social misfits.” That, I believe, is the reality of today’s society.
How do you view the term “career”?
The strings of text and abstract images that emerge as a result of how deeply a person has immersed themselves in the “role” they’ve taken on.
In our society, we call this a “career.” While a career is often imagined as an “accumulation,” I view the concept of “career” from a different perspective.
It’s not just an accumulation of what we’ve built up; it’s also a history of what we’ve discarded, what we’ve chosen not to play or take on.
To put it another way:
What society evaluates
is not life itself,
but “how much of oneself one has carved away to become explainable.”
In modern society, people without a career are easily excluded. Why? I believe it’s because characteristics like being “unexplainable,” “unmanageable,” or ‘unpredictable’ are all seen as “difficult to handle” in modern society.
In Closing—The Choice to Keep Thinking
Probably, not many people will share this sense of unease I feel. Maybe no one at all.
But I’m okay with that. As I mentioned at the start, this article is both a record of the unease I felt and a statement of my stance as an artist.
I won’t be a representative.
I won’t be anyone’s spokesperson.
I won’t present the “right” answer.
I’ll just leave a perspective behind.
Why can people so easily become lost within their roles?
Is that truly “adaptation”?
Is a life not reclaimed by roles a defect?
I still don’t have answers to these questions.
But I don’t want to pretend this sense of unease doesn’t exist.
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